I Can See it Now

It's been a bit. Since I was last on here, I came back to the States, and I am on the verge of applying for my work visa to the UK. It is a P R O C E S S, let me tell you.

There is the paperwork, documents, and stamps of approval needed, of course, but beneath that is a tidal wave of energy and emotion I have tied to the outcome of my visa getting approved. This is 6 years worth of wanting this.

In 6 years I've gone from 'that's not possible. I won't be able to make that happen,' to 'yeah, I'm actually applying for this! I've just about made it happen!'

In 6 years...

I've struggled through the guilt that every expat faces: am I selfish for choosing me and moving away from family in the States? The answer is you must always choose your happiness, period. To combat the guilt my family has put on me (they're human, and I forgive them for this), I have used EFT, also known as tapping, to heal those shame and guilt ridden parts of me (it works wonders!).

I've also battled mixed emotions on going back: have my feelings changed over this place I've adored? The answer is no, I love it still, and I know this on a soul level. Fear gets in the way of what you know on a soul level, but that doesn't erase the fact that you know it. Thank God for instinct and intuition.

Lastly, I've worried over resources and how I'm going to get this accomplished. I went from seeing dead ends to visualizing what I wanted and making it happen. Through this, I've realized I am a master manifestor. I am able to achieve just about anything I freakin' set my mind to.

Which brings me to today, sitting and doing a manifestation meditation exercise (yes, I'm into this stuff), and visualizing my visa getting approved. I then saw an image of me walking out of Heathrow with my approved visa, and feeling a sense of accomplishment, success, happiness, freedom and love all in one. It was a overflow of emotion, and I started sobbing while doing this meditation. I sobbed for all the years and energy I have put into this idea, and I cried out of pure joy at the thought of getting it. I felt the tension and worry release from my body, I felt a divine knowing that this was my path, and that this visual would be my reality.

And that is how I know this is right. I can see it now, and I have worked so damn hard for this. I can see it now, and it's nearly mine.