Some of the best advice I've ever gotten on dating came from a news report I was watching last night about the famous "Last Lecture" professor, whom has since passed away from pancreatic cancer.
He said to all the girls listening, "Ignore everything a guy says. Only pay attention to what a guy does."
How simple. How brillant. Man, I should have heard that advice a year ago when I was listening to every word J was saying, and not paying attention to his ACTIONS.
Women, including me, get especially swept up in the guys that are masters of language--the poets, the musicians, the expert-complimenters. As I've gotten older, I've become weary of these men. They say things in the most perfect of ways to get exactly what they want.
Now, I'm not completely jaded. I believe there are good men out there, and on top of that, there are good men who can say beautifully-crafted things. They just have to back up what they say with what they do.
I've come to the realization (as I have in the past, before J) that I am extremely content with being single. I kinda always have been. I answer to myself and myself alone. Of course, there are the twinges of lonliness that invade when I see a cute, loving couple together; however, my logic snaps back into action and I remind myself that it takes a lot of work, and the right person, to be in a cute, loving relationship.
It's tempting to take the offers of dates from random guys that seem cute and say nice things to me. But there has to be more--I have to know a guy for awhile, trust a guy for awhile to date him. There has to be something about that guy that intrigues me, that makes me want more of him, that makes me want to be in a relationship.
That's why I say (to all the people that still ask why I'm single): I will be single until a guy that's worthy enough and intriguing enough comes along and takes me out of that singledom. Until then, it's just not worth it.
To end, I give another quote from the wise "Last Lecture" professor: "People ask why I waited until 39 to get married. I answer, 'It took that long for me to find a person whose happiness was more important to me than my own.'"
Actually, that quote made me tear up a little--and I harldy ever cry.
