You May Say That I'm a Dreamer

I guess I shouldn't have presented that "news" as news in my last post...it's more of a final decision.

First of all, I did hear back about the internship in Turkey for the summer. They asked me to pick from some obscure cities in Turkey, so I turned it down. But not just for that reason.

My "news" is that I have made the decision to pursue going to Turkey for a year, and I'm going to pursue it wholeheartedly.

If you couldn't tell, I gave up this idea a couple months ago. I was thinking about continuing my life, here in San Diego. However, as I started searching for temporary summer jobs in Turkey, that enormous desire to just go, just fly away to my motherland (hehe) came back to me.

To get the full experience, I know a year is what's needed. And I want that full experience. And I know that I will fully regret it if I don't try for this. Obviously, God has etched this idea on my heart. It's something I've wanted to do since childhood--from the first time I can remember visiting Turkey, and realizing in my 7-year-old brain that I wasn't just a visitor. Turkey has always been a part of me, and I part of it.

What is discouraging, and is bringing me down a bit, is that my family is still concerned about how I am going to do this and being very vocal about it. I don't mean to completely glamorize Turkey: there are criminals, Americans often get ripped off and Turkish men seem to have the idea that American women are easy. Hmmm...could that have anything to do with Hollywood?

My family is only looking out for me, but I am being perceived as pretty naive, like I'm going to fall for all the traps set out before me. I am the baby of the family, the youngest cousin on both sides of my parents, and I've always been treated as the baby. I am, of course, arguing the timeless complaint of every youngest child ever born: "You tell me not to go, so I don't fail...but I'm telling you that I want to have the room to fail."

Anyway, there is a lot to research in all of this. But I just wanted to let you all know that I have to go for this. There is a chance that this won't come to fruition. But I need to try, and put my all in it.

"There is no destiny worth pursuing that doesn't face huge obstacles." --Erwin McManus

P.S. I'm not just looking for jobs in Istanbul, I'm also looking in Izmir (my mom's favorite Turkish city)--right by the Greek Isles, and beautiful!