I think too much...

First, I just wanna say, ignore my last post. I sounded blonde for a moment there...Jesus Christ!

Second, I need to stop driving. Cause when I drive, I think about life way too much. I'm sure you do too. Geez, I should really pay attention to the road. And I think about weird and serious things. Weird things such as: why don't we have an extra eye in the back of our heads? Cause that would be super cool. And, what if there really was another dimension...that would be sick!

Yeah, I'm weird.

But, like I said, I also think about serious things. Like today I thought about relationships.

It's funny for me to talk about relationships. All my good friends know, I haven't had many--they really don't last long. Plus, I don't think you could really call them relationships. Let's see...this past year I (kind of) dated Dave. Haha....that lasted maybe a week. So sad.

Then, a few months later, I (kind of) dated Donnie. I lost interest with him quickly, though he was nice and kind and all that jazz--it wasn't enough. I need someone who's gonna argue with me...dammit!

Then came Daniel (dun dun dun). Probably the first guy I've ever wanted to start a relationship with. And what happens when I do? He doesn't want to start a relationship with me. He wasn't "over his ex-girlfriend." Gee, that's nice. Couldn't you have told me that before? Like, before you kissed me and played with my emotions?

I'm an honest girl. I just want someone to tell me the truth. So of course I get liars.

It's funny to look back at who you dated and what went wrong, isn't it? But when you're in that moment, when you're dating that person, you're judgement is clouded.

I'm a smart girl. And a logical girl at that. But I look back at how much effort (A LOT) a gave to dating Daniel, and I wanna slap my wrist. I was Sooooooooooo stupid! I hate that. I hate looking back and seeing just how stupid I was. I shouldn't have tried, he wasn't worth my time. I deserved a hell of a lot better.

I guess you could say it was a "lesson learned." Everything is. But that doesn't take the sting away. Maybe it'll eventually go away. Maybe it bugs me now because it was just a couple short months ago.

Whatever. This is why I always think I'm better off alone. I'm not unhappy alone. So why do I let guys come in my life and mess around with my head?

I just tell myself that a new school year is coming up, I'm happy about that. I'll focus on my studies and my friends. And if someone comes along, then that's fine. I'm not gonna let some lying asshole come into my life again and shift my focus away from what's important. I know I'm being a little harsh, but this is how I feel right now.

My feelings will probably change. It's always good to know that I don't need someone else to make me happy. I'm pretty cool on my own :)