Contemplation in a Bad Situation

So...I'm a little angry. But not as much as last night. It's funny how a night of sleep (and weird nightmares) can do that to you.

Basically, my sorority had elections last night and I was not chosen for a position I was running for. I think my number one mistake was believing I was going to get it without any hesitation. Yeah, I made my wax wings and flew by the sun...you can indeed call me Icarus (one of the only Greek stories I can remember, haha).

That is why pride is a downfall. But, some pride is alright...being a cocky bastard, however, is not alright. And while I wasn't quite a cocky bastard...I was a bit too prideful.

I just hope that people thought I did a good job in my positions this year, I REALLY hope it's not that I did a bad job. Cause that would be worse. I don't believe anyone wants to be known for doing a bad job. Hopefully, they just wanted to give more people a chance in my position.

It still hurts. It feels as though someone has scanned over my life and said "Eh...well, that was mediocre."

But...I am a good person. And a good writer (take that, humanities professor!). And I have a good heart. And that's what matters.

And, now I have to reevaluate my life. Where are my priorities? Have I been investing too much time in my sorority? Yes, a bit too much sometimes. It's hard to put a lot in and get nothing back, you know?

And...I want to write for my school newspaper next semester, and was a little hesitant to that plan and how it might interfere with my position. Not to mention school!

I KNOW that my grades haven't been the best they can be because of all my invested time in my sorority (I have a 3.2--Dude, I can totally bring that up now).

Anyway...I'm carrying on a bit much. So I'll end it here. Really, thank God I have a blog to express all these feelings...thank God I can write this all down and get all this negativity out of my system.

Yeah, it's painful to have your pride hurt. Really painful. But I'm not gonna be like Icarus and drown in the water. Cause I know how to swim. Yeah, I have back-up. I'll swim to the top of the omnipotent ocean (it can't keep me down) and find a new, fun place to shine!! It's cause I'm that cool (just a little pride, guys, just a little).

Oh yeah, and michelle, if you read this...sorry I didn't call you back yesterday! It was a hectic day, seriously, see you in class!