When did weddings become such a monster? By monster, I mean an all-consuming, bank-depleting, brain-washing, fire-breathing animal that torches everything in sight?
That may have been a bit dramatic...But here's my beef with weddings:
1. They are f***ing overpriced. Venues, flowers, wedding dresses, bridesmaids dresses, presents, showers, pre-parties before the main event, more dresses, more presents = SUFFOCATION. Couples get so wrapped up in the fantasy of the big day, they forget about the reality of their bank account.
2. They are forceful in their traditions. Not wearing something blue on the big day? Sacrilegious! Thinking of skipping the wedding shower? You can't, that's a major event! Don't want to buy a big cake? No, sorry, you HAVE to...because, we said so.
WHEN did it get like this? WHERE did all these "traditions" come from? And why does everyone insist on following such a Nazi list to a tee? You know, the list:
- Engagement Party
- Engagement Photos
- Wedding Shower
- The Perfect Invitation
- Bachelorette Party
- The Perfect Dress
- The Perfect Bridesmaids Dresses
- The Perfect Flowers
- The "Best Day of Your Life"
Which brings me to my next point...
3. Everything has to be "perfect." People forget something they know quite well when planning for weddings--life is not perfect. Nothing goes exactly as planned. NOTHING IS PERFECT!!!! But time and time again, I see chicks freaking out that things are not going swimmingly. These women spend so much time and effort focusing on the "big day," they almost have a mental breakdown when one hair is out of place. That's too much pressure and stress for my liking!
I know I sound like a cynical, anti-wedding freak right at the moment. But remember, this is more of a vent session. I actually quite like weddings, if done the right way. When planning a wedding, here's what I think:
- Do what you want, not what everyone else tells you to do. If you're big on all the traditions...go for it! But if all these pesky traditions are stressing you out, why have them? Who said professional engagement photos are a must? Who said you MUST send out save the dates? DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO.
- Try not to put a gazillion expectations on one freakin' day. This takes some discipline and effort on your part, but realize that you're going to have much more fun if you're not expecting perfection.
- Be aware of the monster. When things get overwhelming, make sure to question everything. Remember that you are dealing with a money-making industry persuading you to buy more. You are a human who is capable of philosophy and great intellect; you are not a drone. Cut out the things you don't need.
I'm sure you've figured out that I'm not a big wedding kind of girl. I'm a traveling gal! If I ever get married, I'm more apt to peace out for a cool destination wedding with immediate family--no rules, no regulations, and no matchy-matchy brisdemaids dresses. This is my personality, and my wedding would be sure to reflect it. I've had some friends, assuming that they know better, tell me "Well I will make sure you have more at your wedding!" No you won't...because that's not what I want, woman! (I also get really peeved when girls insist on talking about hypothetical weddings with me, when I don't have said groom on the horizon).
Your wedding should reflect your personality, whether it's a huge extravaganza, or no wedding at all. Don't let anyone--friends, the industry, the wedding monster--persuade you differently.