There are some moments in life where you get a huge slap in the face. Tonight was one of those nights.
Have you ever experienced something that humbled you so greatly you almost broke into tears?
Earlier today, my friend Jenny asked me if I wanted to go with her to feed the homeless, and I agreed to tag along. Trying to push misconceptions and fears out of my head (although they still stayed in the corner of my mind), I made my way to downtown San Diego to approach druggies, abandoned families, the brokenhearted and the like. Yeah, I was scared shitless, not gonna lie.
We broke into groups of three (two girls and one guy in each group--made sure to play in safe) armed with plates of enchilada meals, and some bible verses for good measure.
I don't know if I can justify the intensity and power of each conversation I had with the homeless, but let me just say that I saw them as people. People with broken souls, people who were frustrated with their disposition, people who straight out asked "How could God do this to us?" And I don't blame them for asking that question.
I was astounded that they even let us talk to them--here we were, middle-class white kids, shiny new shoes on, clean hair, dentist-approved smiles...and they let us talk to them. And...they listened. They really listened to what we had to say. If I were them, I might have kicked our asses right there.
One that really touched me was Jessica: a long-haired Mexican beauty with a rosary around her neck, whose eyes were filled with tears of gratitude. And she let me pray for her. And after the prayer, I saw a tiny spark of hope in those defeated eyes of hers. Even if that spark just lasts for a night, I wanted to show her that there are people who care, and will continue to care (because the one above cares--this I truly believe).
Sorry if I'm sounding preachy here...but I just came back and I am truly touched. I'm not posting this to get a pat on the back, so don't leave a comment like that. I'm posting this because my heart has been a little shaken. I've just witnessed actual people living in tents on the street, and I've actually stopped and talked to those people today, instead of avoiding them like bags of trash on the sidewalk.
How much of a selfish brat am I for complaining about my life!?! There are moments when you realize you really know nothing, nothing about true despair. Not until despair stares you right in the eye.
This was a touching post. We all need those wake up calls in life. I have my stereotypes about the homeless as well, and living in a big city they are everywhere. So it's not that I'm afraid of them, sometimes I forget that they could be my very own future. I heard once that a large number of the homeless are actually working, but they don't make enough to support their families.
ReplyDeleteSo true! It's not only wonderful to volunteer and get that nice feeling in your heart, but to help the truly unfortunate, that makes everything you find unfortunate, not so bad...
ReplyDeleteHey - good for you! You changed the world just a little bit - and made a difference.... Or, as I call it, you put feet to your faith and put God's love into action. Doing something for others is sometimes the BEST way to experience God and His love - and how amazing for you to share it with these people. As you saw for yourself, we are all God's children - whether we have a roof over our heads or not - and whether we have shiny shoes or not. I loved your post! Keep changing the world - one day at a time, one action at a time!
ReplyDeleteSee the change, be the change, right? And this is much better than having to give change I would think.
ReplyDeleteOkay, this gave me chills woman.
ReplyDeleteI have always wanted to do that but haven't ever known anyone that has experienced that.
I know you said not to, so i'll keep it short and sweet: Bravo. Sounds like you touched some hearts today. (There and on here!) :)
I loved this. I did a lot of servicework with the Boy Scouts, helping the homeless in Detroit and it was one of the most moving experiences of my life.
ReplyDeleteHuh, I've never actually had the balls to go and do something like that. You've got a lot of courage, Ashley.
ReplyDeletei do a little meals on wheels for the elderly and st. joseph's diner for the homeless, so i hear ya. its a good experience, good feeling. kind of keeps you in check.
ReplyDeleteI like where your head is at Ashley. You've just done something that I don't think I've even considered. Kind of puts things in perspective, doesn't it??
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