Dude, what's up with Beijing? I'm sure you've all seen these pictures before...but pollution much?That's. just. nasty.
Anyway, to update you...I talked to J a couple nights ago online. Now, I've talked to him a few times before, and everytime he talks about how he's depressed...yada yada yada. (Because his enagagement was called off in March).
So when I tried to give him advice on how to get better and how I got better after he hurt me (and you all know that he HURT me very badly), he basically rejected it.
He said something to the effect of, "This may sound cruel but my situation is worse than yours was."
Can you say jerk? How about asshole? Yes, that works better.
The reason I talked to him a few times since our friendship/relationship dissolved was because I still cared about his well-being. But after this most recent conversation, I realize just how selfish he is. He truly thinks about himself and himself alone. Why should I bother to help? On top of that, I can't help. Maybe once he's lost all of his friends (and he's lost most of them already) he'll realize what a conceited prick he's been.
So I'll wish him a Goodluck and Goodbye and be on my way (yeah, he's in the top five, of course). Talking to him at all won't help him and won't help me.
I think the saying may be true...that past lovers can never remain friends. At least in this situation it is.
He's kind of a tool.
ReplyDeleteThe end.
Yes! I think slowly but surely I've realized that. haha.
ReplyDeleteIn my experience, a lot of time has to pass before friendship can even be put on the table, Ashley.
ReplyDeleteI've never understood that old adage - that past lovers can't remain friends. I think that's bunk.
ReplyDeleteMy best friends in the world are all ex-girlfriends of mine. They already know me better than anyone else; why should I drop them as friends because we're not dating anymore?
(luckily, they all have the same attitude toward exes. nobody holds grudges. we don't blame, and we accept that we may not have been perfect to each other when we were dating. I guess there's a lot of tough honesty in there, which I'll assume is at least part of the reason why some people can't be friends with their exes.)
That said, yeah, J sounds like a tool.
Kinda uppity, actually. Sure, your situations might be different, but he's pretty closed minded if he won't even listen to your advice.
Ugh Bejing is grody.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I haven't used the word grody since grade school.
I think it's a combination of gross and.... something else that probably means nasty.
Which I think should be grasty. But that just sounds weird.
As you've probably been told and honestly, will continue to hear, it's better this way. To cut off ties that is. I mean, being a good person and caring about his well being is one thing and you can keep doing so, just do it from a distance. Distance is the best way to get over the feelings that were had and to move on with your life. That...and a steady regiment of heavy drinking. The latter is not advised during the whole job hunt thing and/or if maintain the desire to see the light of day.
ReplyDeletei think i know someone who'll be perfectly destructive for him. :) and i see we're dropping more high fidelity-isms now. once you start you'll never stop.
ReplyDeleteEven time won't resolve it. Trust me, I know, if they're still vain, selfish little shits, then you might have to cut him off for good.
ReplyDeleteWhat do they say in Seinfeld about relationships? Tear it off like a Band-Aid; RIGHT OFF!
What an idiot! Glad that you are over that one.
ReplyDeleteAnd yeah - Beijing is foggy, huh?
He's an asshole.
ReplyDeleteExes are the worst. I ran into one of mine and his new girlfriend this weekend. AWKWARD.
She gave me evil death glares.