The One About Almost Lovers

"Everybody knows almost doesn't count..." --Brandy

Almost lovers, crushes, part-time lovers, flings...is there a real name for them anyway? I suppose the lack of a proper name for such a situation reflects the ambiguity of it all. And so it's fitting.

Forgive the following robotic post. If you were looking for something sappy, you're at the wrong blog. Get out now. I'm too logical by nature. So, let's be logical...

The horrible thing about almost lovers is that they don't "almost" hurt you. And they don't just take "part-time" energy. However, there's a philosophical view to this, right? What really gets hurt? Is it your heart? Or your pride?

The funny thing about almost lovers is that it makes you feel incredibly silly and prepubescent. Like you shouldn't be engaging in such behavior, when you know something is not going to work out, but you indulge yourself anyway. It's edging on the side of being insane, no?

The best thing about almost lovers is that they are the easiest to get over. You haven't really shared that much intimacy with them (depending on your situation, I suppose). The only relationship that's been built has been in the construction zone of your mind. So get the wrecking ball out. Crush that seemingly stable wall down. When you do, you'll find that it's made of paper, or sugar, or any other material that is unstable or dissolvable.

And then, you're free.

Ha, I didn't mean to write a guide on How to Get Over That Almost Lover, but it turned out that way. Maybe it was for myself.

I'll end here with a dialogue from Adaptation, which I saw for the first time 2 weeks ago. God, I love these lines:

Charlie: There was this time in high school. I was watching you out the library window. You were talking to Sarah Marsh.
Donald: Oh, God. I was so in love with her.
Charlie: I know. And you were flirting with her. And she was being really sweet to you.
Donald: I remember that.
Charlie: Then, when you walked away, she started making fun of you with Kim Canetti. And it was like they were laughing at me. You didn't know at all. You seemed so happy.
Donald: I knew. I heard them.
Charlie: How come you looked so happy?
Donald: I loved Sarah, Charles. It was mine, that love. I owned it. Even Sarah didn't have the right to take it away. I can love whoever I want.
Charlie: But she thought you were pathetic.
Donald: That was her business, not mine. You are what you love, not what loves you. That's what I decided a long time ago.

I suppose a lot of things in life are about learning how to regain the power.