The 10,000 Hour Rule

I've been reading a book called Outliers which touches on the idea of the 10,000 hour rule. This rule states to become an expert at something you must practice it 10,000 hours. Obviously, musical instruments and sports come to mind, but this can be applied to anything.

On my flight back to the States a few days ago, I talked about the book with a guy next to me and he asked "What have you done for 10,000 hours?"

I thought for a second and realized that the answer is writing. This blog has singlehandedly prompted me to write up a storm for a good 12 years. 12 YEARS I'VE HAD THIS BLOG. 

I've not written as much the last two years--the entire time I've been in New York City. Unfortunately, that shows me how New York City suppresses my creative energy. It's also the amount of years I've been full time at my job, so I've also just been BUSY.

I'm slowly inching my way back into the joy of writing as it's something that releases anxiety and brings clarity to my life--it's a form of meditation for me. I feel a tad rusty, but it's already feeling great hearing that 'tap tap tap' on the keyboard. It's a reminder to make time for the things you love, a.k.a., the things you are willing to practice for 10,000 hours. If all of a sudden you've stopped practicing something you've invested that much time in, things may be off balance, and it's time to take restock of how you spend your day.

As I've spent the last 2 months on the road, I now think it's time to write write write all the thoughts, experiences, and conclusions floating around in my head. Hello writing, it's me again, Ashley!

What have you practiced for 10,000 hours? 



Photo credit

My Hurt Ankle is a Reminder to be Mindful

I'm sitting here this morning with my ankle wrapped in a soft cast (I missed the last stair and landed hard on my ankle), and my eye swollen from a bug bite. Also, things have been kind of shitty in New York of late, and I'm sort of like, "What else you got for me, universe?!"

It's easy to focus on the bad things, amirite? And then focusing on all the bad just sort of snowballs into feeling perpetually bad. Humans hate being uncomfortable, and man, am I uncomfortable right now.

The inconvenience of not being able to walk is just a reminder that I've been spreading myself too thin. I tripped down the last stair because in a stressful moment I was rushing and wasn't mindful of the fact that:

1. I should take my time. Why was I in a hurry?

2. I've been living in a tornado in my head, stressing myself out and barely taking any time for relaxation and meditation.

I've been going so hard and feeling so exhausted, I've barely given myself any rest. Well, I'm being forced to rest now.

With that, I'm taking a looooooong break in San Diego starting next week. How lucky am I that I can have a month-and-a-half stay wherever I want because I work remotely?

I'm gonna go rest SO HARD I hope to get bored (I haven't been bored in awhile). I'm going to make time to write, listen, and read. I'm going to return back to a place of mindfulness.

Ommmmmmmmmm (added for effect).

Rejuvenation After a Tough Week

Last week was tense and unkind. I wanted to go into the new week with a renewed energy, so I took a Saturday to unwind, focus on me, and indulge in girly stuff. It was a day where I didn't necessarily want to talk to a bunch of people, or go a ton of places; rather, I was looking for an at-home spa experience.

Sir William Bedfellow and me takin' it easy. 

Ashley's Steps to Rejuvenation on a Saturday:

1. Start the day with a meal that makes you happy. For me, that was waffles and french pressed coffee! 

2. Watch all the bad TV and movies. I'm talking about the trashy reality shows and over-the-top chick flicks. I chose Ladies of London, Endless Love, and Magic Mike. This will take your mind off problems, at least for a bit (yes, I believe a little distraction is necessary). 

3. Relax. Practice a yoga routine. I picked a cheeky Austin yogi to run me through some anxiety releasing moves. 

4. Pamper. My hair has been dry, so I scoured the interwebs for an easy at-home deep conditioning treatment for hair. I like this coconut oil one. Also, because my sleep has been erratic, the dark circles I've been sporting are not so pretty. INTERNET TO THE RESCUE AGAIN! I made a simple turmeric mask for under eye dark circles: mix honey and yogurt in a bowl and add a couple tablespoons of turmeric. The amount of honey and yogurt is up to you! Smear under the eyes and leave on for 20 minutes. Rinse with warm water. 

5. Give yourself a break from bad thoughts. Just push the negative out of your mind. Focus on letting yourself relax. When the negative thoughts resurface, just say, "Shut yo mouth!"

6. Only do this for a day. I wanted to be alone on Saturday, but Sunday I was right back out there, socializing and watching the US soccer game (UGGGHHH, boys...a tie?!?).

Having a day of rejuvenation gets you refreshed and back into the game. Now only if our USA team would get back into the game! ARGH!

Here's to a better week!

Finding Peace in the Midst of Fire

You'd never know by this picture that a good portion of San Diego was on fire this day (although you can see a bit of smoky haze in the distance).

It may be a little reminder that we can always find mental solitude in the midst of the fire. Where it's a chaotic schedule, negative thoughts, tragedies, or a series of unfortunate events causing fires in your life, I hope you are able to find solace some how, some way.

It was nice to stop time for just a little bit by walking on the beach, taking in the misty sea spray, and forgetting for an instant about those raging fires.

P.S. San Diego is doing better, by the way. Fires can always be put out, no matter how destructive and huge they seem. 

Blackout Magic

As you may have heard, San Diego, Orange County, parts of Arizona and Mexico experienced a major blackout for the better part of yesterday. My heart swelled with joy when I learned of this...

First, because I got to go home early from work (mwahaha).

Second, because I've always believed that we would just be better off without computers, TVs and any other glowing screen that sucks away souls.

The reaction to the blackout was priceless: Some initially panicked, traffic was insane to the point of the police force and military being sent out to direct intersections, and a few accidents occurred.

But as people settled at their houses and got their spare candles out, a sort of blackout "magic" worked its way over San Diego. I'd like to call that magic human interaction. My roommate and I sat out for 3 hours talking, laughing and drinking wine with our neighbors, something I'm not sure we would have done had it not been for the lack of power (those pesky glowing screens). I ventured out on the street and saw the same thing everywhere. People with people. Sitting on their lawns. Talking to their neighbors. It was like we were transported 50+ years in the past, and simpler times were playing out before our eyes like a feel-good film.

I heard a few cheers when the power got turned back on, but secretly I wished for the opposite. Today I'm anticipating people being distracted, yet again, to what's truly important. All to rush off to their phones and computers, and check their facebook notifications. A silly notion when you realize we could just interact with each other in person, here and now, instead.

My Perfect Saturday

Ahhhh. You know when you just have one of those great days? As if your lungs have expanded because you've been breathing in life?

Saturday was one of those days. It was a day where we did nothing more but shoot the breeze, take lots of frivolous photos and celebrate Lucille Ball's 100th birthday with some red lips painted on our faces (might as well have painted a constant smile on mine).

Oh wait, you wanna see the photos? Oh okay. Be warned, I said frivolous for a reason...

My chip is bigger than Lainey's; Ummm...flexibility much?; Christian feeding me gelato, and me totally hamming up this picture.

The silliest pictures were a result of us waiting for our friend's salon appointment to finish. When you combine a sunny day, a sense of humor, and a camera, this is what you get:

Notice Christian acting very sneaky...the progression of these shots cracks me up...

Where are your hands going, Christian?

HIGHLY INAPPROPRIATE :)

After our scandalous photo shoot (there are more dorky photos I refuse to show), we decided to wander over to a cafe, naturally. Good thing we were in Little Italy and I was in the mood for a cappuccino.

I was loving the indulgence. Can't wait to one day indulge in real Italy.

We returned to the salon to find that our friend was finally finished. That's when Shakira came on the salon's radio. When Shakira plays, you can do one of two things: 1. Pretend that you are nonchalant and sit in your chair, or 2. Let the beat take you over and have a dance party.

We chose the later.

Bethany and I are actually shimmying here. The only way to tell is to look at my key necklace.

Sadie, the hairdresser, teaching the girls how to shake their hips.

I love it when I capture candids when no one realizes ;)

Dancing in salons works up an appetite, so next we devoured a meal in the heart of Old Town. Afterwards, I stumbled upon a divine sign:

How convenient! I've been looking for those.

No, you dork. Not imaginary swords, there are real ones if you follow the arrow!

The sword shop had every sword imaginable, and even some weapons I'm pretty sure are illegal in the U.S.; maybe that's why I wasn't allowed to take photos...hmmm...

We ended this perfect day with a I Love Lucy marathon, and I was complete. It was all a reminder that it doesn't matter where you are or what you are doing; rather, it's completely about who you're with.

So won't you join me next time?

The Progression of Anxiousness Into Epiphany

I've been going through some growing pains the last few months. While it's easy to succumb to negativity during such a time, I must look at it more objectively, as a season I'm going through.

I've posted this quote at least once before, but it's one that I always come back to, so here it is again: "To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring."

We cannot always live in spring. One, this would make life boring. Two, what would we ever learn about ourselves? Going through uncomfortable/sad/anxious times is not desirable, but it always elicits self-evalutation. And for this, I always want these "seasons" to be a part of life. It's through self-evalutation that I always get my best epiphanies!

When we go through rough patches, I think we focus way too much on ourselves. Why is this happening to me? Why do I deserve this? The past few months, I've been thinking about what will make me happy a little too much. Me me me...blah blah blah. No wonder I've been bored, anxious, upset and a little down.

When you think about yourself, and only yourself, what a horrible existence that is!

I realized, it's been months since I've volunteered. I started to pray less, to almost not at all. My life started to revolve too much around Ashley, and no one else. My excuse was that I had too much going on and too much to think about: new job, moving, bills, tickets...the madness of it all! Now, I'm not perfecto. I do have a lot going on and I have been ultra busy, but I know better. And I know myself pretty well. I'm at my happiest when I'm helping others, in some way, some how...

So recently, I've been filling my mind with thoughts of other people, and it's been so refreshing to let my mind breathe in that way!

I realize that it's impossible to be completely selfless, but this is an epiphany, remember? So let me revel in my utopian ways!

At the end of the day, this is about finding solutions to make my life more peaceful and balanced. So I guess, making it not about me is still all about me. Ha. What a paradox. Still, why not help others in the process?

I think you know what I'm getting at. So forgive this poorly edited post. Sometimes, one just has to write it out...

Finding Peace on a Sunday

Ah, Sundays, mi amor. I love Sundays because they are a rebirth of a new week.

I always get my best ideas on Sundays.

This Sunday has been about remembering that God is still there despite my absentmindedness in regards to Him. I read, and then he speaks to me, a gentle nudging from the pit of my stomach.

"Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind...Better what the eye sees than the roving of the appetite" --Ecclesiastes

My translation: Everything I need is right here with me. Trouble (or toil) is so very easy to chase, because it is flashy, desirable and leaves one wanting. But does it ever fulfill? Give me peace and tranqulity every day of the week. It is all about appreciating what I have, and not lusting about the horizon and its hazy shapes of nothing.

Please, please, always give me peace.

Music Challenge, Day 10: A Song That Makes You Fall Asleep

"In a Sentimental Mood" doesn't make me fall asleep, necessarily, but it sure relaxes me! What a great song to sit around drinking wine to...this song is just chill. I don't know a tremendous amount about jazz, but I know Ellington and Coltrane are two cool cats.

The Challenge so far:

day 01 - your favorite song

day 02 - your least favorite song

day 03 - a song that makes you happy

day 04 - a song that makes you sad

day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone

day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere

day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event

day 08 - a song that you know all the words to

day 09 - a song that you can dance to

This is Your Brain on Work

Remember that old drug commercial with the egg in the frying pan? You know, the "this is your brain on drugs" spiel? Yeah, yeah...that's my brain right now. But switch drugs with work.

I realized (spoiled brat that I am) I haven't worked since the end of February. I started my new job yesterday and I see a lot of good things about it. But the hard part is in the next few weeks: I have to know all the policies and procedures about the University, their requirements and financial aid.

It was once of those moments out of a movie where my boss handed me a stack of books filled with information we have to know.

Realistically, I don't have to know it all. Of course not. I'm not a computer or a robot or anything of that nature. But the perfectionist in me wants to be a robot. I gotta tell myself to calm down...seriously, Ash, you're not made outta metal.

What's good is, I like my boss (he's suuuuuuper laid back) and I like a coworker that I've met (I meet the other two members of my team next week). You can't ask for better than that! The rest will all fall into place...

Hello Excitement! Nice to see ya.

I've mentioned that I've been very bipolar in the weeks leading up to my departure, and while that is still true, today I've felt excitement take a hold of my body and shake me violently. I'M FREAKIN' GOING TO TURKEY!!!!!!

While the sadness is still there, I am now in autopilot mode. My body is leading me where I ought to go...my head and heart have no choice but to follow. Inevitably, I will feel more sadness and anxiety in the next week-and-a-half; however, there is no doubting what is necessary here: chasing after my dream.

There's nothing like the beat of a happy heart, a heart that knows it's about to embark on a predestined adventure. I say predestined because I've wanted this forever.

***

While I'll probably have more posts like this where I talk your head off with inspirational garble (ha), I must not forget to mention that Jax, my good internet and real life friend, came to visit San Diego. Let me show you with pictures:

It was nice taking Jax to all the "hot spots" in SD, so I could simultaneously say goodbye to my city! Chillin' at La Jolla Cove.

My Oven GF showing us Americans how to have proper ettiquette during breakfast =)

Celebrating Jax's 24th birthday!

Ashley loves Jax! (Photo stolen from Jax)

2011, And In With a Bang!

New Year's Eve was all about havin' a good, senseless, dressed-up to the nines, kind of time!

I don't wear heels that often (I'm not really a 'beauty is pain' kind of girl), but I welcomed that instant pump of sexiness on NYE.

My Zero and me. Why dance with a hero when you can dance with a Zero? (refer to Earth Girls Are Easy)

We all headed to a gay bar in the area for a good dose of dancing. I didn't expect to get hit on anyone there, but oh dear lord, I forgot about the bisexuals. The funniest part of the night was seeing a guy that was hitting on me earlier make out with a drag queen later in the night. Those boys are confused, ok? ha. We stayed until 12 to have a toast to the New Year, then realized we were dead tired and headed home to pass out. Being 25 means you start to become a grandma :)

My friend Bethany the "hood rat." haha.

The first day of 2011 entailed chillin.' Pure chillin.' We cruised the harbor in Bethany's convertible, had a delicious breakfast, walked along the shoreline, and perused the mall like true Americans.

Happy New Year everyone. 2011 is going to be the year of MORE. I'm convinced of it.

Daydream Believers & Homecoming Queens

I had the song in my head, and it seemed like an appropriate title for the pictures I am about to show you.

Plus, my friend Beth and I were wandering around Hillcrest, the well-known gay district, so there were a lot of "queens" around. ha.

Manicures...yay!

Tea Time, anyone?

At Pinkberry getting some frozen yogurt :) I put EXTRA mochi in mine.

I had to borrow tights from Beth (I am surprised they fit) because it got cold and windy today. HELLO FALL!

A Casual Saturday (and cussing to boot!)

I'm having a gloriously lazy day today. I did a little work in the morning: studied a little Turkish, and studied for my TEFL certificate. Did a little laundry...you know, a little here, a little there. But now I'm reveling in my complete, unadulterated laziness. I didn't have any real plans and I'm not really gonna make any plans.

It's one of those Saturdays where I am fulfilled by doing nothing.

Status: Currently watching Love Actually and wasting the day away...

P.S. Just for a giggle, let me teach you a turkish curse word! I was having a convo the other day with a co-worker who knows arabic, and she was telling me how to say the "s" word in her language. I then realized that I didn't know any Turkish curse words. I thought to myself, "well that is just unacceptable!"

My mom thought it amusing when I asked her how to say 'shit' in Turkish that very day. I'm surprised she told me: Bok. Bok bok bok. (pronounced 'boke'...like you are saying poke with a b).

heh heh heh.

Just thought I'd share that new little nugget of info with you fine people. Hope you are having a great Saturday!!

Weekend Adventures!

Saw Iron Man 2 over the weekend. My thoughts? It was kick-ass, bad-ass, or any other type of ass you can think of. It wasn't quite as good as the first movie, plot wise; however, the winning element of the movie was Robert Downey Jr., of course. His quick-witted cocky comments are always a delight to watch, and no other actor could pull off that kind of charming narcissism better than him. You should go watch it for a little dose of joy. Plus, the race track scene is intensely fun (this scene also makes me want to visit Monaco, BADLY). I give the movie: ★ ★ ★

In other news this weekend:

I drank a little too much Friday night. Oops. It's been awhile, and Blackberry Stoli is so covertly strong, I didn't know what hit me...which leads to Saturday, the hangover day. I didn't want to venture outside, but I promised a kid at my work that I would go to his baseball game. How horrible would I be for not showing up?

After dragging myself there and seeing this smile:

...any trace of headache melted away. Apparently he had been telling his parents all week that I was coming, since he was so excited. This is why I love kids.

And then Sunday, I CLEANED THE HOUSE LIKE A MAD WOMAN!!! For mom. of course. You know when you get in those cleaning moods? I was like a cleaning tornado! I literally cleaned the house. It sparkles, thankyouverymuch.

Anyway, that's the recap of my weekend. How was your weekend?

My Thought Process (While Watching 10 Things)

• Putting ice on my lower back at the moment, because I hurt it at work. Little kids like to beat me up. ha.
• Watching 10 Things I Hate About You while administering the ice, which is making me feel better.
• Missing Heath Ledger. Not just because he was an Australian hottie, but also because he was a damn good actor. Even in teen flicks.
• Realizing that Joseph Gordon Levitt always was and always will be adorable.
• Trying to devise a plan to meet said adorable actor. Hmmm...
• Wishing I could go back to the simplicity of my teen years.
• Rudely reminding myself that my teen years were anything but simple.
• Oddly content with staying in tonight and just watching a movie. Or two.
• Eager to share some news, but wanting to leave it for its own post...
• Leaving you with that thought, because who doesn't like cliff-hangers?
• Remembering that it's more fun to give cliff-hangers than to get them. hehehe.

Attitude Adjustment

I love having good days after bad days. I even cried yesterday and was being a little dramatic, which isn't so typical of me. I'm more of the logical thinking type than the emotional type. But yesterday, I felt as if I had to kind of throw my dream out of the window.

Truth is, I don't.

So this is the plan I *think* I will be following. I'm going to get certified in teaching english to foreigners. Then, I'm going to go ahead and see what job offers I get, and if they are sufficient for what I need. If so, I'll go. If not, I'll stay and think of another path (staying in SD or maybe going to another state).

I know there's no real reason to make a big deal out of this. I was making a big deal because I've never left San Diego. It's like I don't know how to navigate leaving this place. I feel half-child like, like I haven't grown up enough, like I'm stuck in a way. But there's no need to feel that way.

Even if I were to stay in San Diego, I could do plenty of growing within this city with so many opportunities. What has been sucking lately is my attitude. Life is, truly, what you make it. I've been thinking that staying in San Diego would stunt my personal growth. Going to Turkey looked like a way out of that. "If I move to another country, surely I'll grow into more of an adult!"

I'm a dork sometimes. Although I still want to go to Turkey to just go to Turkey (LOVE THAT PLACE), I'm not going to cry and kick and scream over it if I don't go. It will not be the end all and be all.

The Big Guy upstairs will let me know which way to go (He always does), and in the meantime I'll e-mail some teachers at some of the schools at Turkey and ask how they're getting along (thanks for that advice, Michelle).

And I'll look on the bright side. Cause at this stage of my life, there's a LOT of bright sides. Heck yeah.

I've Been Through Hell

Man, this past week was really trying. Each week at the camp, we get some returners as well as a new batch of kids. Well, the mix of kids this past week was HELL-ISH. HELLLLLLLL-ISH. Everyday after work, I either indulged in ice cream or wine. Until I finally prayed about it (hello!) and got some divine guidance on the situation.

What was the situation, you ask? Three boys (one of which was 8) who were hitting on counselors, saying things like," Damn girl, you have a nice ass," AND causing fights with other campers left and right. WHERE DO THESE KIDS GET THIS FROM?!?

Anyway, I made some suggestions to my boss last week to make the program run smoother (he liked them). So, I'm hoping the next week with be better. PLEASE oh PLEASE oh PLEASE! So I don't rip all my hair out!

Yesterday, I had a much needed day of rest. Pool and tanning and eating Greek food and basically BEING A BUM. And I am tanner (yay!). And I feel more relaxed (yay!).

Here's to a good week...PLEASE GOD!

By the Bay

I had some time to kill before church today, so I figured I would kick it by the water. The day was already perfect, so I knew it would be a good idea. I drove down a random, unfamiliar street that eventually stopped right at the edge of a bay. There was exactly one parking space--one space reserved for me.

I stepped out of my car and instantly felt a peace take over my body. I wish I would have taken a picture of the scenery. But I left all electronic devices behind. This was a time for me to unwind after a busy, tiring week; this had to be just me and nature.

I don't think I can explain the moment I had today, but it was a moment that rejuvenated me. A moment where God nudged me on the shoulder and said, "Hey kid, don't stress yourself out. I got this for ya." A moment where I realized how small I really am. Too small to understand exactly how the world works, yet alone try to control it. Us humans are silly for trying to control our lives so much.

Looking out into the water today, I saw the world working perfectly. And I'm not in charge of any of it. Fittingly.

Learning how to work within the world puts me at ease, instead of trying to make my own, contrived way. Sometimes you just gotta take the time to gather your thoughts by the bay, and let the surroundings tell you the answers.

Emerged in Sunday

I love sinking myself into Sundays. They are, by far, my favorite day.

I become a daydreamer on Sundays. My mind expands. I feel the wind and sun tickle my skin--and all the elements surround me.

Everyone needs a day like this. A time to get back in touch with the earth, a time to get in touch with the Creator of everything.

Don't let drama get in your way today. Stress, that's not the topic of my thoughts. Not on Sunday. I'm breathing as easy as a breeze today.

A day of meditation. A day of prayer. A day to be renewed.

2 Corninthians 4:16-18